Like a swiss watch...precision clockwork

(Im venting here...so if negativity upsets you...skip this entry please). 

It’s like a Swiss watch…precision clockwork.  X seems to stir up something every three weeks.  Some sort of conflict.  Im not really sure of the reason why, Yes, I think I know the reason, its something to remind herself that I need to be the “bad” guy.  Three weeks ago when I was making plans to visit my kids in the U.S. she would not allow me to see them on my planned visit of May 21, because that, according to the decree was her weekend, and that I couldn’t visit them the week after because that was the start of summer vacation and thus not my weekend either.  So she said I could have the third weekend so I rearranged my plane reservations to visit on the third weekend.  X knew full well that the kids had plans to visit with new hubby’s parents that weekend something they told me they had planned for months  So X knowingly set up the conflict to make me out to be the “bad” guy.  The kids didn’t want to rearrange their schedule to see me and would only allow me a fraction of my visitation time, so I wound up cancelling my visit.  It hurt…it hurt bad.  That is what X seems to savor, opportunities to use the children to hurt me, since she can no longer hurt me personally.   I went to lunch with my friend Russ yesterday.  I told him, “I sense something brewing Russ.  She always instigates a conflict on the third week.”  Its been three weeks since the last conflict.  Sure enough something happened.

My parents haven’t seen the kids for 9 months either.  They at one time were very close to my kids.  According to the divorce decree which X uses religiously, there are no compromises, my visit is supposed to be the month of July.  She has already dictated that she is using her court allowed visit of July 3-5 to visit them.  She has had them for 9 months straight and she needs the July 3-5 of my month to visit them?  Im certain she doesn’t have the best interest of the kids at hand.  Every chance she can get she tries to drive the knife in a little deeper.  My parents and I decided that since the kids refused to come to Bahrain, and refused to come to California, that I would visit them in Texas.  I wanted to take them to Europe (or a country of their choice) if they came to the Middle East.  If I couldn’t have that, then I’d take em to Disneyland and Universal Studios if I went to California.  They didn’t want to come to California either. So we decided to make the best of Texas.  We found out that there was a luxury cruise ship that was available one of  the weeks of my visit.  Since my daughter’s dream had always been to go on a cruise I thought it would be a nice idea.  I was pretty excited about it.  I knew they would have a great time.  So I tried to talk to my daughter and she refused to talk to me.  I haven’t had a nice conversation with her for months.  X and new hubby have told her that I have done some horrible thing which is a lie from the pit of Hell.  But I can’t defend that with her.  She’ll realize the truth when she’s older, unfortunately the damage is being done by X and the new hubby in the mean time.  Anyway, I couldn’t talk to my daughter so I communicated with the boys.  I told them that I wanted to take them all on a cruise.  They almost immediately told me they didn’t want to go.  Its like I barely got the words out and they said no.  It was clear they were being coached.  I got upset.  Since when should a 10 year old and a 13 year old child dictate the rules to their father.  Is that just the nature of divorce.  I don’t blame my children, I love them dearly, but its clear that they have been brainwashed/poisoned by X.  Its all part of the parental alienation syndrome.  If you want to read more about this horrible phenomenon http://www.paskids.com/ It is my situation to an absolute T.  Of course X and new hubby and even the kids all deny this, but that denial is simply a part of the syndrome.   I think X affirms the kids everytime they stand up to me.  Its manipulation.  We were once very close. 

So I was pretty upset and I raised my voice to the boys to express my displeasure.  They hung up on me.  So I called back and new hubby picked up the boys line.  He started yelling and cursing at me, despite the fact that I asked not to speak to him.  He kept yelling told me that I didn’t listen and then cursed some more and hung up on me.  The boys had to be right there, they live in a tiny house.  I’m not sure why new hubby has injected himself.  They are not his kids.  This is between X and I, but he seems to have thought it to be his responsibility.  They have made up a scenario…where I’m the big bad wolf, X is the damsel in distress, and new hubby the knight is shining armor.  Its all quite dramatic, stupid, and needless.  But X has always had the need to have drama in her life.  If there is none, she’ll manufacture it.  I can go back and tell you the conflict for the last three week increments going back to our divorce.  Its sad.  Im outnumbered in that house.  Im the “bad” guy in my kids minds.  Its all very very unfortunate.  Im sure they’ll read this and figure out a way to make this all my fault, that is part of PAS too.  It sucks, she cheated, she filed, she got the kids, she got the support…yet its all my fault.  Go figure.  Once again…Divorce sucks.