It was a strange day all around. I think I realized the reason for my funk, was a spiritual attack. I don’t want to give the enemy too much credit or too little credit. I think it hit me while I was watching Terminator: Salvation last night. I think there is indeed a war being waged spiritually that we can’t see. The visualization of that metaphor in my mind on the screen was powerful. If I take that point of view, I can handle the crappy stuff that comes my way a little easier. It helps me put it into perspective. I told you that I hadn’t really done my devotions for about two weeks, so spiritually I was unfit and prone to more attacks. Its like I became the spiritual 98 lb weakling again and the enemy was the hulk. Well…I did find my Bible and I’m trying to get back on track again. It wasn’t something that happened all of a sudden, it was a slow drift. But since I’m doing God’s work over here, there is more of a giant target on my back. I guess that is why they say, to whom much is given much is required. I have to “man up” and be prepared. Be a man for all seasons to steal a movie title.
I wound up having a nice long talk with the Czech in the middle of the night. That’s what I have to do to communicate with her because of the time difference. I went back to sleep at 7 am or so, and didn’t wake up til 3:20 PM. What??? I’ve never ever ever slept that late. These are unusual times and unusual circumstances. I skype with the Czech, so its free and we both have webcamera’s so that makes it a little more personal.
I wanted to see Night at the Museum 2 since Max saw it and liked it. But I just have this thing about seeing a kids movie without any kids. I think it makes me seem a little sad. So I went to my go to Island kids, Tanya’s kids. I like taking them. Raimond wound up joining us which was nice. I feel like a distant part of their family sometimes. That makes it a little less lonely for me here. Oh what I wouldn’t do to have my kids here with me, even for a visit. I know they would love it. This is really an ideal place to raise kids. Its probably one of the safest countries in the world. There is no terrorism and virtually no crime. There are a load of ex-pat kids here mainly from England and since the private schools are so wealthy, the schools can afford to pay high salaries which lure the best teachers over. Its also nice because you can travel quite a bit. At one time my boys wanted to come over to live with me till X encouraged them to change their minds. They can’t really stand up to her otherwise they would be ostracized within their own family. Hopefully, I’ll be able to have them over just for a visit so I can share part of my life with them.
I know that God has a plan and a purpose for me being here. That also means a plan and a purpose for my children since they are my responsibility. I’ve never missed a child support check so I’m doing my part there. I just wish I could have more influence over their spiritual and emotional development. I’m a great dad, but that responsibility has been taken away from largely by the whole ‘system’ of divorce. God has a plan for my kids…I just have to keep them in prayer that way.
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