Saturday, November 29, 2008

sleep, sleep, and more sleep.

Sleep, sleep and sleep…

Not much that was eventful happened today. I got two days in yesterday and just relaxed today. Saturdays are turning out to be the non-activity day for me. And that is ok. I cherished the opportunity at first. I work a lot during the week so I don’t get a lot of sleep. So I try to make up for it with one day. Rolled out of bed at about noon. Headed to an Irish pub for breakfast. Had this amazing traditional English Breakfast. What makes it English, is they have this strange sort of English Bacon, which is a cross between Ham, Canadian Bacon, and regular bacon. Not sure where on the pig they get this from, but it is delicious. It reminded me of when I used to live in Saudi. I lived next to this British compound. All the brits hung out there, because you could get bootleg alcohol and pork there. Every Friday, I would go for the English buffet. It was the highlight of my week until the Saudi authorities found out about the place. It was closed up soooooo fast. I missed it, so this place reminded me of that.

I turned the TV on for a couple of hours today even. That was the first time since I got my 1500 channel dream box. I figured, I worked hard, so I deserved to just waste some time. But the more I watched, the more depressed I got. I went to dinner at this great pizza place around the corner. I live next to this street called “American Alley” Its right next to the navy base and its filled with all type of Western oriented food. I love the restaurants there. I sat outside on the patio just enjoying the weather. For the past month, the weather has been just spectacular. It feels like San Diego here right now. Temperatures hovering around 75-80 with no humidity. Except, they have the metric system here…I have been struggling to make the conversions in my head.

As I was eating my dinner and reflecting on all that God has done for me. I got a bit anxious. Even though, im living this amazing life right now full of adventure, potential, fulfillment, the fact remains that Im still alone. I don’t like being alone out here. If I had someone I cared about it would be different. I think if I had a spouse or even a girlfriend I’d be on absolute cloud 9. But there is just that gnawing feeling that something is missing. Someone special to care and share it with. Its times like this that I bemoan the fact that im divorced. Its just ironic that one of the many reasons why my former spouse says she divorced me…was because I was financially unstable. Which was absolutely the case. The entertainment industry is screwy that way. The irony of all that is…as soon as our divorce was final…my career has skyrocketed. Im making good money and have more potential future income than ever. I think she pulled the plug too quickly, but again, it only takes one person to decide to get a divorce. So even though Im living the supposed “single” man’s dream lifestyle, its still just a tiny bit empty. I’d trade everything I have and dig ditches if it would bring my family back. But that window has been closed. Now God is trying to get me to start over and quit looking in the rear view mirror. I think this is the feeling that Adam must have had when he said its not Good for man to be alone. I know im walking according to God’s perfect plan, and that plan will work out in his timing and not mine.

I did meet a girl…no not the Romanian..another one. She’s cute, funny, energetic and loads of fun. But there just isn’t that feeling that the relationship is “right”. I don’t want to settle. Its very tempting to have a relationship, just so I won’t be lonely. But that I think would be incredibly selfish on my part. I don’t want to have to date again, to play the market, and to snatch a bride. I just want a short-cut. But I don’t think that is going to be the case. I guess I just have to trust God on this one.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Lookie here...a white guy in church

Lookie here…a white guy in church…

OK, im certainly not acting my age, and im not sure if that is a bad thing or not.  On the weekend the social scene on Bahrain is clubbing.  I made an observation last night amidst all the smoke and drunken people on the dance floor.  I don’t like clubbing.  There are a multitude of reasons, not the least of which, im a sucky dancer which I said again and again.  But, there really aren’t a lot of alternatives other than going to coffee or out to eat for social activities.  The whole sub-culture of the island resonates within these clubs and there are many.  I don’t drink, and I don’t dance, but its better than being at home watching TV.  It gets me out in the social environment.  Im actually starting to recognize friends when I drop by these places…so hey my network is actually growing. 

So I was out at a club (it’s the weekend so im being responsible somewhat) til 2:30 last night, and I got up at 6:00a for church.  If you remember from a couple of blogs away, I was questioning whether or not I was an actual missionary.  Because, im not handing out tracts, preaching, or going door to door.  So I was really worried about this.  If I am called to be a missionary, is there something else I should be doing other than forge relationships?  The timing was interesting this week.  I was listening to a sermon by Steve Madsen on the Parable of Jesus sowing the seed into four kinds of soil.  3 out of the 4 soils were bad.  That is 75% where the seed won’t take root, blossom and do any good.  So Steve’s take was that we are all supposed to be sowers of seed.  Our job is not necessarily to harvest the seed, others are called to do that.  I believe our job is not to argue or debate someone into the Kingdom. That is the job of the Holy Spirit.  Our job is to plant and let the Holy Spirit harvest the seed.  I mention that message I heard on podcast this week, because it was echoed by the pastor of the church I went to today. 

It turns out Reji, our IT guy, is a strong Christian as well.  God had laid it on his heart as well to start a Bible study.  So now, when I get it going, I’ll have at least two people (including myself) to let it grow and see how God wants it to blossom.  It was also kind of confirmation for me that im indeed called to be here.  Its no coincidence that Reji and I are working together.  That’s important for me to realize and remember.  My kids think that I have abandoned them, which is absolutely not the case.  That’s why your prayers are still coveted.      The church last week was full of Filipino worshipers, which was cool.  The church this week was larger, about 400 people and all Indians.  I was joking to Reji, that I must be the only white believer on the Island.  Then as we were leaving we spotted another White guy.  But since he married an Indian, I tried to convince Reji that it shouldn’t count.  The service was interesting.  There was a guest pastor speaking today.  I can probably say, that none of you might have ever had the opportunity to listen to a Uganda preacher share in a Indian church.  Overall the church was exciting, refereshing and inspiring.  I think there needs to be a stronger church presence here to cater to the many westerners.  Im sure some might be uncomfortable with an ethnically centered style of worship. 

After church…I took a long nap.  I finished my video project for the Demo for KSDI.  Now, im just waiting on Manu to do the finishing touches on the open.  Its going to be incredibly when he’s finished with the open.  I’ll post it when its ready. 

Later that night, I went with Khalifa to see Body of Lies.  If you haven’t seen this movie, I highly recommend it.  I told Khalifa I related to the DiCaprio character.  He chose to stay in the Middle East after his tour, because he fell in love with the culture.  There’s a line from his handler played by Russell Crowe.  “Why would you want to live in the Middle East?  No one wants to live in the Middle East.”  Dicaprio responds: “Maybe that’s the problem right there.”    That is exactly how I feel.  There is such an underappreciation of the good things of this culture.  I chose to stay, come back, because A. God told me to, and B. Im really starting to fall in love with the people and culture.  Its cool being able to invite your boss to a movie especially since he’s passionate about movies too.  I think he felt honored.

Im tired…its 5 am…I went to another club tonight.  Im certainly not acting my age…and that’s not a bad thing.  

Thursday, November 27, 2008

thanksgiving and clubs....

Well its thanksgiving and it just doesn’t feel like thanksgiving.  I went the whole day without wishing anyone a happy thanksgiving until 5:30 closing time.  You see…they just don’t celebrate that day around the world.   So once I figured it out, I scrambled to tell everyone Happy Thanksgiving.  I tried to call my kids several times, but there are only certain times that their mom allows them to use the phone.  It makes it difficult to connect.  So we usually wind up trading messages.  The restricted schedule and the time difference make it really challenging to communicate with them. 

Last month as soon as I arrived I saw that Ric’s Country Kitchen, my fav. American restauran, was taking reservations for their Christmas buffet.  I put myself down for two, thinking, surely in a month I could find someone.  So here it is the day before thanksgiving and my friend…the Romanian is in Singapore to run a marathon.  That makes me down to one friend Barraq, and he had plans.  I met this really pretty girl via facebook, we started chatting, and thought it would be fun to celebrate Thanksgiving together…so I did fill out the reservation after all.  We went to a club afterwards called JJ’s an Irish pub.  It’s mainly filled with Navy guys and Gulf Air girls.  It just amazes me how many people flock their to drown their sorrows.  I just saw a lot of unhappy people.  I am trying to get into the club scene but its just so difficult.  I don’t like to dance, I don’t like to drink, and I see through the facades and see the reality.  So that doesn’t make club life very appealing.  Everyone is searching for something there.  I just wanted to jump on a table and shout..Everyone here has a God shaped hole in your heart and you have to fill it with something.  You all are choosing alcohol and sex, and its not going to fulfill.  In that type of environment with drunken navy guys, I don’t think it would have went over too well.  I might as well just wear a “God Hates Fags” sign on Castro St. in San Francisco. 

Im going to keep this a little short tonight, and im not even going to proofread it.  Im tired, so if there are typos, you’ll know why.  I talked to Reji…he doesn’t have a car but longs to go church.  So I’m picking him up in 4 hours and were going to go to church tomorrow.  Im already looking forward to my Friday afternoon nap. 

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

An outstretched hand...

It was strange.  Yesterday I was really cranky.  I admitted this to everyone.  I think it was a combination of being sick, with flu-like crap, and frustrations at work.  When I can’t figure something out technically, Im not at ease until I figure it out.  So I left work when it was not yet resolved and that hung over me.  Roxana, the beautiful Romanian was back in town and wanted to go to dinner.  I forewarned her about my spirits.  Within just a couple of minutes she helped lighten the load.  She is delightful girl with an infectious and positive personality.  God already speaks to her…she just doesn’t know His name yet.  Its only a matter of time, Im convinced til she figures out who He is.  She’s too dynamic for anything else.  She even offered to come to church with me.  Im not sure which church I’ll take her too just yet, since I don’t have a home church at the moment. 

OK speaking of churches.  When I first came over here, my boys wanted to accompany me, until their mom helped change their mind.  So Max has a heart for ministry.  He wanted to reach out to others.  I told him I was coming over to start a church.  I had no idea how that was going to happen, since I didn’t know a soul over here.  Its not like Im going to go to the mall and pass out fliers.  But it was something that God had laid upon my heart.  I figured as long as Im walking according to His will, I won’t have to do anything.  God will set everything up for me.  That’s the beauty sometimes of walking by faith, there is no pressure.  You just wait upon God and he’ll do the rest.  It says “do not fear” in the Bible 365 times more than any other teaching point.  Hmmmmm 365…I wonder if that has anything to do with days of the year?…with the subtext meaning everyday…you don’t need to fear.  Im living proof of this.  As I have bemoaned the fact that previously 3 out of the last 4 years have been very emotionally traumatic for me.  Yet through all the fire and crap I had to wade through, God was always telling me…not to fear.  In fact one time I was talking to God by looking in the mirror.(that’s one of the main ways I talk to God more on that in another blog)  I was really hurting this particular day.  And God spoke to me.  He said, put out your hand in front of you….So I did…while looking in the mirror.  He said, “I got you in the palm of my hand.”  Then He said put your other hand on top of your outstretched hand…which I did, cupping each hand together.  He said, “Im going to protect you in this storm.  I will shelter you and the wind will not destroy your flame.”  OK, sounds pretty poetic, like im talking to myself trying to encourage myself…power of positive thinking…yadda yadda yadda.  Three days later I fly to Houston to visit my kids.  I go to Lakewood and Joel Osteen in his message outstretches his hand from the pulpit and says “He’s got you in the palm of His hand.  Nothing will be able to destroy you.” There was my confirmation that God indeed was speaking to me.  Anytime that God does speak to you, he will confirm by 2 or 3 or more witnesses saying the same thing.  So for all you Anti-Osteeners out there, there’s some pretty amazing circumstantial coincidences that support that God speaks through him.  God has spoken to me like this more than 50 times while I was going through the crap.  Some amazingly specific words too that almost bordered on the miraculous or at least in the realm of incredibly amazingly coincidental.  You choose how to interpret and believe circumstances.  It seems the darker my life became, the more His words were guiding me out of the dark tunnel and into the brighter light where he wanted me to venture.  I’ve finally made it to the light…and coming out of the tunnel culminated with me coming over to Bahrain, im quite convinced.  I have become quite attuned to hearing God’s voice now.  He has always been speaking to me, but I rarely took the time to listen.  What God wants most from us is a relationship.  Any decent relationship has its share of both talking and listening.  Yet how many Christians, just talk, talk talk to God…and never take the time to hear things from God. 

So, I wasn’t sure how God was going to help me set up this church, but I figured if he wanted it, why worry about the details.  So I have a friend (I won’t say who, just yet) who is seriously considering moving out to join me in this venture.  This person is a strong Christian, he will be my roommate for awhile enshalla (God willing).  Armand, the good looking South African photographer is the son of a priest and I know he’s searching for meaning, The Romanian, wants to come to church and lastly, Reji, the IT guy from work.  Reji, was always happy and always smiling.  I like him and he’s very good with computers.  I took the Indians out to lunch today.  I’m taking all the employees out in several groups out and buying their favorite hometown foods.  I want to learn, respect and appreciate their culture.    First it was the first batch of Indians/Sri Lankans, Then the Filipinas, now the second batch of Indians.  They took me to this wonderful, yet pricey Indian restaurant.  I drove and Reji noticed my Bible and my book “Case for Christ.” In the back seat.  He mentioned that he read all of John Osteen’s books and listened to Joel Osteen on the Internet.  Are you kidding me?!?!?  I didn’t even tell him Lakewood was my home church yet.  He hasn’t found a church in Bahrain to go to yet, because he doesn’t have a car and its difficult for him to get around.  So im going to pick him up early on Friday (that’s when church services are) and we are going to go to a Church called…the Church of Philadelphia.  God is setting everything up and I don’t have to worry about a thing. 

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Insulin...whew...

I actually misspoke in yesterday’s blog.  I had about two weeks left of a certain type of Insulin.  I had about three months worth of the other type of insulin.  I could have made it work, but it would have just been a challenge.  So I found a diabetes hospital.  I programmed in my phone on my GPS and off I went.  I wouldn’t find anything without my GPS.  No one knows addresses around here.  They are just landmarks.  Like trying to find this hospital today, I asked for the address and they wouldn’t tell me.  They would say…you know where the Al Jafeer Hospital is…um no… Do you know where the Budaiya clinic is…um no.  I don’t know where anything is.  After I said no long enough, they put me on hold and someone reads to me the address from their letterhead or something.  The streets here are a little strange.  Other than the major streets everything is done by number like Road 3402, Bldg. 1144.  It seems logical at first then you notice that the street signs are incredibly obscure if they are even there at all.  Its not that big of island, so it won’t take me long to learn it.  But everything is navigated by landmarks both for locals and foreigners. 

Speaking of driving, Arabs are kind of notorious for being reckless drivers.  If they get in an accident…its Allah’s will, if they don’t get in an accident it’s Allah’s will.  So that takes the pressure off of them responsibility wise.    Their philosophy in driving is that everything in back of them. Is not their concern or responsibility.  Their only focus is on the road straight ahead.  That is why it’s incredibly common to get cut off on a regular basis.  You have to stay on your toes.  Probably the main reason why Arabs pay only attention to what is in front of them is because of the gutras (headpieces).  If they are wearing the gutra in the traditional way, it cuts of about 50% of your peripheral vision.  Its virtually impossible to look all the way behind you when your driving and wearing your gutra. 

 Everytime I go to the doctor they want to check my blood, do a battery of tests, and prescribe a proper insulin regiment.  I’ve been around to sooo many doctors.  I have found the best manager of my diabetes is me not some doctor that just met me.  So I’m always a little apprehensive seeing someone new.  Just give me the prescription Doc, and I’ll be on my way.  I found the perfect doctor for that.  He understood my situation.  His name was Dr. Hussain, if it wasn’t for his slight accent, you’d swear he was a westerner.  He was educated in Cleveland, then New Jersey.  He like talking about going to the Cleveland Indian baseball games and the Rock and Roll hall of fame.  He had fond memories of the U.S.  I told him what I needed and he gladly obliged.  If I wanted to come back for the tests, I could at my leisure.  So he wrote me a prescription to take as many insulin vials as I wanted.  I was also fortunate that this was the only hospital in Bahrain that carried the type of insulin that I needed.  So I think God was looking out for me.  The insulin actually is cheaper here in the Middle East because prescriptions are subsidized by the Government.  That is a great relief to me because I don’t have health insurance.  Because of my diabetes/pre-existing condition, I cannot get health insurance.  So im walking by faith that something catastrophic doesn’t happen.  

Monday, November 24, 2008

Turn the Other Cheek

Turn the other Cheek

OK…I laughed a lot today… That was very refreshing. I woke up with kind of a strep throat, so I made an appointment to go see a doctor. Im a little bit worried, because I have two weeks worth of insulin left. I know they have insulin here…but do they have the kind that I use? I checked with a pharmacy earlier today, and this little pharmacy didn’t. So im hoping the hospital im going to tomorrow…a diabetes hospital has what I need. Im not worried at all…God will provide as he has all along.

OK, Khalifa and I were chatting. He always tries to instruct me on the ways and culture of Bahraini’s and Arabs. Im always all ears as I try to soak in as much information as possible. Somehow we were discussing that in business you had to be aggressive and tough with Arabs. Keep in mind this is coming from an Arab himself. Khalifa said…”Arabs are different than Christians. You have to watch out. For Christians, they hit you and you turn the other cheek. For Arabs, they hit you…you turn the cheek, and they hit the other cheek.” I just burst out laughing and then that made Khalifa start laughing. He has a really great sense of humor. I really enjoy working for the guy. He’s so full of life. Its just a different type of relationship then owner employee. I mentioned earlier, he thinks of me as a son, like he thinks of all his employees. He tries to take care of them the best he can. I know it’s a working relationship and there is about a 25 year gap in our ages, but there is genuine friendship there. Its really nice. I think it comes from mutual respect. He’s a filmmaker and im a filmmaker. I invited him to go see “Body of Lies” with Dicaprio and Russell Crowe. If you haven’t seen this Ridley Scott masterpiece, I highly recommend it. It paints a very accurate portrayal of the Middle East and the CIA’s involvement here. I did a documentary on the CIA and was actually in CIA headquarters years ago. So im quite familiar with how they operate. As a matter of fact I might have just put myself on a “watch list” by writing that. I love the CIA and what they do…They get a very bad rap in the public…but more on that in another blog.

Now not only is Khalifa a great guy, so are all of his children. His children all revolve around my age and I work with all of them. I spoke to Khalifa’s ex wife at the banquet on Friday. I told her that she and Khalifa must have done something right in raising their children, because I loved all of them. Each and every one, Nader, Tanya, Nadiya, and Omar are all very intelligent, extremely talented creatively. They all have their personality quirks too. When I came over to initially interview with them. They booked me in a five star hotel and Tanya came over with six bags of groceries to put in my suite. Then they all invited me into their homes to meet their families. It wasn’t about just a job, it was like I was joining their family in a way since it is a family business. It is an honor and something I take very seriously. It’s all part of making it fun to go to work each day.

The second funny event happened with Saji the editor. I mentioned a couple blogs ago that Indians have a tendency to say yes to everything, even if they don’t know. They swivel their heads back and forth and say “no problem.” We missed a couple of assignments that way. I pleased with the guys to tell me no if they didn’t understand. Their response (head swivel) “No problem” For those of you that know me…or even those of you reading the blog, know that I ALWAYS repeat myself often times beating the dead horse til he’s ground into glue. So that tendency for overkill really comes in handy when you are talking with the Indians. So today, I was talking with Saji, and gave him a directive. I said: “Do you understand?” He said “No”. I started jumping up and down cheering…at first their look of incredulity turned to a smile turned to laughter…I was finally getting through.

Then Jeddah, one of our photographers brought in this Awful smelling fish dish for her lunch today. This stuff reeked. I asked her if she caught the fish in 2006, but she didn’t get the joke. The stench of this thing permeated the entire office. The other staff members were complaining as they had previously asked Jeddah not to bring in this fish. Now Jeddah is a sweet girl, but a little obstinate. You sometimes have to tell her several times before she gets something (I know, I know, Hey kettle…this is pot calling…you’re black…) So she was pleading that she doesn’t make a lot of money, and she has to eat her lunch in the office. I told her that was fine, but bring chicken or something in next time. Anything other that that putrid fish. If you want to eat it..eat it for dinner, or breakfast. Just keep it far away from the office. The smell was worse that Chow Dofu (Do you remember that?).

Finally I went for the second consecutive night to the Iraqi restaurant Baraq took me to a few months back. Now this area…is way way way away from any westerners. Its certainly an Arab hang out. I have never seen a Westerner in this place. I love to go there, because they have incredible lamb. Its just absolutely delicious all for about $8. I feel safe…even though im surrounded by various Arabs dressed in their national dress (thobe and gutra). Im not sure if my presence there makes them uncomfortable or not. My old boss at Aramco, Abdulrahman clued me in on a secret. Arabs will not approach you first…but if you make the first move then they warm up immediately. I found that to be the case time and time again. Usually whenever I eat alone, which is often, I bring my Bible with me wherever I go to read during the meal. My Bible has been my lifeline for the last four years, my secret passageway to God. So I hadn’t read my Bible yet at all today. So I was tempted to bring it into the restaurant. Then I thought better of myself. Even though my I can freely believe however I want to believe…I didn’t want to flaunt it. I was afraid me being in this restaurant and carrying the Bible in might be construed as arrogant, and aggressive. Im a visitor in this country and I must respect their culture first and foremost. For some hardliner Muslims it might be construed like an Atheist bringing a Satanic Bible into a Baptist church. How would the other church members react once they noticed who and what it was in their midst? It probably wouldn’t be pleasant. So with discretion being the better part of valor, I left my Bible in the car. Now this was not that I was denying Christ…everyone that knows me here…knows where I stand. I just didn’t want to run the risk of picking any fights. So instead..i brought in “The Case for Christ” by Stroebel. A little less risky. The Muslims do believe in Christ, but like the Jews, they only believe he was a prophet, a good man, but not the son of God. Both the Arabs and the Jews are waiting for Christ to come the first time (we Christians are waiting for the second time.)

Sunday, November 23, 2008

A blah day...

A blah day…

I was due one of these seriously.  After the couple of high this past weekend…things had to level out.  I might have some big news…but I can’t share it with the blog just yet.  Hopefully in a couple of days I can. 

I just found out that the fundraising banquet I did the video for raised twice what they did the year before and three times as much as the previous year.  They credit the increase to the video.  So I guess I am making a little bit of a difference.

I think it was a hard day, emotionally.  Im really starting to miss my kids.  I spoke to Max the middle one.  He’s the only one that really calls consistently.  I feel like im losing them.  I just have to trust God that he has a plan.  You know there are a lot of unfair things that might have happened…and I’ve shared a fraction of them with you.  I just have to give all those frustrations to God.  I need to trust and not try to take things into my own hands. 

You know, I have a little theory that was backed up by some preachers.  We all have that one fatal flaw in our personality.  That which makes us weak and vulnerable to the attacks of the enemy.  God allows it to be put there for us to prove our reliance upon Himself.  That fatal flaw, could be alcohol, drugs, sex, shopping, pornography, gossip, anything that breaks a relationship with our Creator.  We turn to this flaw to self-medicate.  That is the only thing that seems to ease the pain…at least it seems to temporarily.  Its called self-medication.  We turn to the self-medication when we don’t trust God.  When we don’t trust that God will do what He says he’ll do, we try to numb the pain with our self medication.  The trick is the self-medication doesn’t work.  The soothing temporary alleviation of pain usually comes back even stronger, and thus we are forced to self-medicate again…and the cycle begins.  Once that cycle begins its incredible difficult to stop.  That is what they call an addiction…I believe that most are addicted to something, could be anything.  You better believe that the Enemy knows what that weakness is.  He wrote the book on us.  His goal is to get us to self-medicate so that we will sever our relationship with God.  His lies are…”go ahead ease the pain…it won’t hurt, no one will know”.  I have a spiritual theorem  I’ve developed.  IT seems for every one part sin, there is a recovery period of 10 parts (psychologically) to get back to the place where you were spiritually before the sin.  You might say…God is a God grace, He forgives.  Yes he does…but sometimes the consequences, psychologically, emotionally, and physically often stay with us.  So the choice is…with the sin..do you pay now…and suffer the temporary sting of the need to self-medicate and thus heal.  Or do you take the easy way out…and pay the 10 parts recovery later.  We are living in a society of perceived credit spirituality.  Oh yes, God, I’m going to sin, but I’ll take the 10 days punishment…because I really want to do this.  And don’t worry God…it will be only this one time…then, I’ll be back to normal.  Why did I write this?  Im not quite sure…God prompted me for some reason.  And back to Spiritual Economics.  Im guilty as  charged.  It would nice to find the easy way out. 

By the way, I love reading your emails and comments on the blog.  They are very encouraging. 

 

Rick

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Naps and Krispy Kremes

(new pix from Night with the Filipinas below and other staff parties below)

I was soooo tired last night after an emotional activity filled day.  I think I fell asleep 3-4 times while I was trying to write.  That was a very weird experience.  When I went back to read/proofread my blog, entire words were missing.  As a writer, that kind of embarrassed me. 

I have found that the last day of the week has turned out to be my rest day.  I’ve worked every weekend but this is the first day I didn’t do anything with work since I’ve been here.  I slept in late and it felt great.  Got up and went to Ric’s Kountry Kitchen and that is now my hang out spot, I do believe because you can get real pork bacon with your eggs.  You never know how much you miss something til its gone.  I got back to the Apartment and then debated on seeing a movie.  I wound up taking a 2.5 hour nap.  It felt incredible.  I forced myself to stay down.  I’ve been going, going going…it was nice to just stop and re-energize.  I wound up going to a later movie.  It really kind of was eerie.  It was “Taken” with Liam Neeson.  I don’t think it has been released in the states yet, as it probably will be in 2009.  It was a fantastic movie.  It dealt with a divorced dad, a difficult ex-wife who remarried and the struggle he has to maintain his relationship with his daughter.  It really spoke to me.  Then the daughter gets kidnapped in France, and Liam Neeson has to go over and kill everyone to save his daughter.  The latter part didn’t relate to me as much.  It got me thinking.  Last night at the banquet, I sat next to Khalifa.  Khalifa, the owner of the company is a great man.  He’s 68 and considers me like his son.  There is mutual respect for both parties.  What amazed me is that his ex-wife, the mother of all four of his children, flew up to be at this event and to see her new grandson.  They sat next to each other at the banquet and talked the whole night through.  Wow…is that sort of thing even possible.  I know the years probably have soothed the pain of the divorce and made their relationship somewhat amicable, but I was so envious.  It reminded me a story, my divorced friend Molli told me.  I taught Molli and her daughter logann in acting class.  They are a beautiful and talented family.  Molli’s ex-husband flew out from Kentucky this past summer (while I still lived in No.CA) to see Logann perform in acting class.  Where did he stay?  He stayed with his ex-wife Molli and her new husband in their spare bedroom.  Are you kidding me?!?!?   I think it is fantastic that former spouses can get along well for the sake of their children.  And that is now my prayer.  Im so willing to stop the bickering.  But when your ex- expresses her hatred for you in words and in deeds, that makes it kind of difficult.  It sucks because my relationship with my children is eroding away as my life as a single man seemingly starts to take off.  I have material success, professional success, spiritual success, but I feel like im an emotional failure.  I know its partially due to my choice for moving over here, so im not trying to cast blame.  This is a difficult situation, and im trying to make the best of it.  That’s why your prayers are continually coveted.  I have not seen nor spoken to my daughter since July.  She won’t take my calls anymore.  It sucks. 

I had a conversation with a dear friend today (I won’t mention names, but this is a single friend).   This person had a great night out on the town, had lots of fun, but came home to an empty house and an empty bed.  The feeling of loneliness, swept over them.  I can so relate to that.  There is an intimacy in a relationship that I miss.  Now, I know I need to find that intimacy through Christ, but sometimes…its hard to wait.  I know all things work together for good for those who believe and are called according to his purpose…but the whole waiting for all things to work…kind of gets old after awhile.  So if you are reading this and you are married…treasure your spouse, treasure just being able to come home and be with that person.  The grass isn’t greener on the other side trust me. I think every divorced person (if they are honest, will tell you the exact same thing) There are cow patties on each side of the pasture that you step in, and invariably there are more cow patties on the other side, that’s probably why the grass appears to be greener. 

OK, after the movie, I ate in the mall food court.  I bought two dozen Krispy Kreme donuts for desert…no I didn’t eat them all.  I’ve been working out like crazy here, and that makes my blood sugar dip (im a diabetic).  So I got two dozen to freeze for insulin reactions later.  As I was leaving, I noticed the janitors busily cleaning up the tables.  They probably make 60 BD a month which equates to $150 a month.  Plus they send most of it home.  Honestly, I don’t know how they survive.  Its chilling to think what their home must be like to force them to leave to upgrade to $150/month.  Which reminds me of my friend the beautiful Romanian flight attendant.  She grew up poor in a communist regime.  So she usually only ate one meal a day.  Sooo…I figured these guys probably never had a Krispy Kreme donut, because for them, it would be like four hours wages just for a donut. (I didn’t want to figure out a math, but im sure im close)  So I took one of my dozen and offered it to them.  They gladly took it.  Then I went around to the other workers and tried to give the rest away, which I did easily.  It doesn’t take much to be a blessing.  I hope I can do more of it.  Last night my work was instrumental in raising upwards of $250,000 for the poor.  So yes…in a small way…I am starting the change the world…I just want to make a bigger impact, but starting small, by giving a few impoverished janitors a treat is something we all can do. 

As I was quite smug with myself in leaving.  I noticed all the janitors were chewing something, like they were eating.  I didn’t give away that many donuts.  But then I saw it.  They were cleaning off the tables and eating the leftovers from the tray.  For us in the western society, the thought of that is abhorrent, but for them, that couldn’t afford a simple cheeseburger, this was quite a treat for them.  It all just depends on your perspective.  I never really appreciated my wealth till I came overseas to see what true wealth and lack thereof really looked like.  I hope my words can help paint a better picture of what the rest of the world looks like.  I want each and every one of you to realize how blessed you really are.  I know I am blessed…in many ways, im not worthy…but God uses me anyway.  

Addendum to Black Tie night

If you want to see the video I made for the Palm Association, please go to:  http://homepage.mac.com/rickbeeman/iMovieTheater49.html

Friday, November 21, 2008

No Shoes, Burnt Rubber, Black Ties

No Shoes, Burnt Rubber, Black Ties

Wow…I think I have about a weeks worth of items in the blog for just one day. What a truly incredible day it has been.

I got up early…or should I say 8, but hey it was the weekend and I was out at a club til 2a the night before. I hadn’t found a church as of yet, so I spotted one called Word of Life, with English services. I walk into this church and immediately, two Filipina girls try to ask who invited me. I guess walk ins, aren’t that common here. The worship was service going on and I tried to walk inside but I was stopped. They asked me to remove my shoes, which is an asian thing primarily. I did, as I wanted to be respectful, then I entered a tiny room crammed with people. It was certainly a charismatic group and very friendly. It was a mix of Filipinos, Sri Lankans, and Indians. Ummmm I kind of stood out…but that is ok with me. I got used to incredible worship and teaching from both Lakewood Church with Joel Osten and Steve Madsen at Conrnerstone fellowship in Livermore. I was spoiled.   The congregation were very friendly and so full of life. Their smiles just beamed joyfulness. If you want to see the existence of God, all you have to do is look on the faces of these people. Their eyes, will prove it to you. Where Christ dwells, there is life and life more abundantly. It doesn’t have to be an abundance of wealth, but its abundance nonetheless. As Christians, if we follow God’s ways… we will have “enough” and then some. I’ve found wherever I’ve been in life financially…whatever amount of money I make, I have a tendency to live just barely beyond my means. I think that might be a human nature thing. Hopefully, I’ll be able to change that trend. So these people in the church service…they didn’t have a lot of wealth monetarily, but they sure had wealth in their spirit. Im not sure if I’m going to make this my home church or not. I still have a few more that I need to visit. Apparently there are a lot of Christian and Catholic churches on the island. There is even a jewish synagogue. It’s a totally different lifestyle in Bahrain as opposed to Saudi Arabia.

I went the B.I.C. (race track) they were doing drag races. I wanted to get footage of the cars so we could include it on our demo tape, which hopefully we’ll make this week. The race was really interesting…and amazingly loud. I had to hold my hands over my hears, because the roar of the engines just simply hurt.

The highlight of the day was the Palm Association Banquet. This is where the black tie part comes in. I don’t own a tuxedo, but I think I need to invest in one. I have a hunch that I will be going to quite a few of these while I am here. I was hobnobbing with 400 of Bahrain’s elite of the elite. This was a veritable who’s who on the Island. I was fortunate enough to have my very first KSDI project premiere in front of this group. But more on that later. The Palm Association is a Bahraini charity run by “The Palm Princesses” Its headed up Nadiya, Khalifa’s daughter and it was founded by Nader’s (my boss) wife Kirstie, a lovely English woman that just had their third baby, and Tanya is also apart of it.  The Shaheen family has their fingers into a lot of pies. They are quite well known and accepted on the island. Its interesting with a country this small, its actually possible to get to know of almost the entire island. Its like when I was at College, at Evangel. We had a small enough student population that is was possible to get to know everyone one on a first name basis. Its kind of like that here, but only with a few more thousand people thrown in. They raise money for the impoverished of the country and they do a fabulous job of it. What they needed me for, was to create a music video extolling their members to donate. This kind of has become my specialty. When we showed it to all the volunteers…there wasn’t a dry eye in the house…Remember how much I like to make people cry…lol. But in front of the group, there was this quiet what best can be described as “Awe…” You could hear a pin drop afterwards.    Man that sounds really egotistical…but im just trying to report. But the best thing at the end of the video, we had the KSDI logo prominent. It was an incredible branding opportunity, that we just hit it out of the park. Immediately after the video, the live auction was under way. Tanya told me, because they were so moved by the video, they bid even more aggressively (its for a good cause) because they were emotionally inspired. For these types of events…if you can get people to cry…then its like dollar signs going down their cheeks. They gave and they gave and they gave.

I was able to meet some very important people there…contact wise. I know im walking according to God’s ways, so im finding amazing favor. Seated right next to me, quite by happenstance, was a guy by the name of Walter. Walter is an interesting and very funny guy. We started talking and connected immediately. He’s originally from Brazil, but lived for 15 years in the U.S. primarily, Alabama, Florida and New York. Turns out he’s a Christian and went to church when he was in the U.S. What are the odds of that happening two Christians on an island filled with Muslims just so happen to sit next to each other at a banquet …I believe it was a divine appointment. He’s a professional basketball coach, but he’s looking to expand his core business, which is being a consultant and marketing strategist for companies…(hey that’s exactly what we need. ) He doesn’t want to coach for too much longer…apparently the leagues over here and in Europe Asia…if you lose even a couple of games in a row…you are out, fired. They don’t have a lot of patience for rebuilding projects apparently. Walter had some great contacts which we can follow up on them. I’ll give you more details as they become more available. I also met the head of the F1 track (a very powerful man). I also met a bunch of others. By doing well on the film, I created “wasta” (good favor) for our current and future clients with this web video. I could go on and on, about the amazing people I met at the party and I probably will tomorrow. For today…im soooooo sleepy…I just hit the wall so I apologize for any errors.  Good night now...

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Sushi, Clubs and not acting my age...

It’s 2 am; I reek of smoke and don’t feel the least bit tired.  Wow…what a fun night.  I’m blessed to come across a good friend like Mo.  He’s making it his mission almost to introduce me to every person on the island.  I so appreciate it because he has tons of friends and he wants to make sure I’m comfortable here.  What did I do to deserve this?  Not much, unless you believe in reaping and sowing.  It feels nice to finally be reaping some of the good I’ve sown through the years. 

I met some fascinating people tonight, a bunch of them.  We met up with about 15 of Mo’s close friends in swanky Japanese restaurants in the Gulf Hotel.  I had never had sushi before…I don’t really like cooked fish, why would I like raw fish.  But hey…im living in the Middle East…why not experience every aspect of the culture.  So I tried it and I liked it.  What’s more is that I enjoyed the conversation so much.  Sat next to Ali, a Bahraini that lived in India for 15 years.  Really a nice guy.  The group of friends gets together to play squash (like racquetball) and I’m going to be joining them hopefully Saturday.  I also conversed with a beautiful blonde, I can’t remember her name.  She works for Gulf Air.  So basically, if you are white, pretty and young, you most likely work for Gulf Air.  There are sooooo many flight attendants here.  She really played up to my ego.  Once I told her what I did for a living, she was very interested in my stories of Hollywood, the entertainment industry, and global travels.  It felt nice to have someone interested in my career.  Long story there….but this is a no whining about divorce night.

 Then after sushi, we went to a club.  One of the trendiest clubs on the Island is a club called Cocoon Lounge.  It’s directly across the street from my apartment conveniently enough.  Fahdi (I think that is his name) booked us all in the VIP room of the lounge.  He also bought everyone’s dinner, which must have been close to $1000 U.S.  He is a very generous guy.  I think it all comes down to Arab hospitality.  It’s an amazing thing that the West just doesn’t realize.  Fahdi is Palestinian FYI.  So he booked the VIP room and the alcohol was flowing.  They offered me some, but I politely declined and they were really cool with that.  So he got me a Diet Coke.  The night before we went to a different really trendy club, a girl at another party was trying to buy my drink.  Once I explained to her that I didn’t drink, she looked at me a bit incredulously and said “Why not?”  I think it makes certain people (not everyone) uncomfortable when I don’t drink with them.  But not Fahdi and his gang, they were totally accepting of me.  Im starting to get friends.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  I think drinking in moderation is not a sin.  I just choose not to partake at this time in my life.  That said, Alcohol did play a destructive role in the dissolution of my marriage (crap, I wasn’t supposed to talk about that). 

 Then we went to yet another club, and this one was more people my age in their 30s and 40;s.  It wasn’t as loud, but it was packed.  There are so many Westerners living on this island.  It’s all part of the social structure to get out to a club and mingle with your friends, its woven into their society.  I left the last club a bit earlier, because I’m going to try to make it to a church tomorrow to try it out and I had to come write in this blog.  Im afraid what will happen if I miss a day.  It’s also nice to know that I have readers and they send me nice and encouraging emails.  My daughter, However,  was urging me not to write as much…as she thought I had an addiction.  And maybe I am addicted to writing in this blog.   But for me it is very therapeutic But it’s better than a lot of other things I could be doing.  I know it seems like I spend a lot of time writing in this, but actually I don’t   Im a very fast typist/writer.  I usually spend about 20-30 min. writing this.  I actually spend more time replying to your emails, which I absolutely don’t mind…so please keep them coming if you have something on your mind. 

 The clubbing tonight got me to thinking.  Am I a missionary?  Im not really sure.  I know I’m called of God to be here.  I did go to the club, but I didn’t do anything wrong other than be a bad dancer.  Its weird, I have great rhythm and timing when I edit music videos…but turning it on, on the dance floor, that’s a different subject.  So do I consider myself doing God’s work?  Im not sure.  I did have an interesting discussion with Tanya today.  She offered me a piece of her toast, like she does mostly everyday, I turned it down because I was fasting.  That brought up an interesting discussion about faith and Christianity.  I don’t believe I’m called to proselytize, im here to open to have God use me however he sees fit.  Perhaps this discussion with Tanya was one of those occurrences 

OK…now im getting sleepy.  Tomorrow is a big day….


Rick

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Erica...and the choices i made....

What an interesting day…I had a long great talk with a dear friend of mine Erica.  She was mentioning that I didn’t write about her in my blog and she was happy about it.  Well shame on me.  Erica you see is a very dear dear friend to me.  She was my girlfriend right before I came over…we had a short but incredible relationship.  We fell for each almost instantly.  She is one of the most amazing girls I have ever met.  She’s lovely, funny, intelligent, successful, a strong Christian girl…she’s everything you’d want to find in a mate.  I had dated (can I say that outloud Erica) her for a few months when this opportunity opened up.  I had a tough choice to make…well it wasn’t really too tough…because I knew that God had designs on me coming here.  But still it was emotionally difficult to leave.  I miss her very much.  Because of her crazy work schedule, she works 70-80 hours a week as a high powered executive…plus she’s a mom.  I don’t know how she does it all.  It amazes me…and makes me feel very lazy.  So it was quite bittersweet my interview, acceptance and eventual departure.  There were many tears.  But Erica knew that this position was my destiny.  She didn’t get in the way.  Im sure Erica would have swept aside everything to come with me…but she has three beautiful children anchoring her at home.  It would just be impossible.   But for the few months we had known each other…we have become lifetime friends.  I chatted on the phone with her, and we laughed and laughed and laughed…that’s what we did best.  She wanted to know all about the Romanian…(the Romanian is in London at the moment).  Its great to have a dear friend in your life like Erica.  Someone that gets all your obscure references and jokes.  She means a lot to me.  I miss her very much.  I hope she can come visit. 

I had another call from a good friend Jeff Crispi today…a brilliant improv actor, who attending my Improv classes.  He wanted to take me up on my offer of coming over to stay for a couple of weeks.  We were trying to figure out a way he could work for a couple of weeks…just for the cultural experience of it.  He just wanted to cover the cost of his plane ticket, which is about $1800.  So we are still trying to see if it will work.  Everyone is welcome to come visit.  I feel like im living in a dream world over here.  Its quite surreal.  He wanted to experience some of that too.  Im still at the office and its 7:50 pm.  Khalifa and Omar just went home for the day.  I just love what I do.  Im quite fortunate.  The more that I have to do…the busier I am, the more fun it is for me.  I have to be one of the most blessed guys in the world as far as career goes.  As for the emotional…I think God is overcompensating me in the professional realm so the emotional won’t hurt as much. 

I got a call from Mo Loch, a few minutes ago.  There is a private party being thrown at a club.    He wanted me to go along to introduce me to some of his friends.  Im quite honored.  He also said there would be plenty of flight attendants there…so that can’t hurt.  Its all about networking as I try to build up the company.    I did spend 10 years in Hollywood Writing and Directing.  That goes a long way in impressing people out here…it gives you “Wasta” which is good favor.    The only down part for the party is that it doesn’t start til 10:30 pm.  It’s a weekend for Mo and Saudi Arabia (Thur-Fri) but for me and Bahrain its Fri-Sa.   The whole Arab culture is a late night culture.  It comes from centuries enduring the oppressive heat.  Since it was mostly trade for centuries, most Arabs would stay inside during the heat of the day when it was blazing hot…and emerge at night when it was cooler.  That trend lasted from generation to generation, that’s why the night life is so vibrant here.  But for me…Im good for going to bed at 11.  But Im trying to act younger in my second go around at life.  Mo said something a bit inadvertent the other day.  He was talking about people “Our” age, meaning Mo’s and my age.  Im 40...Mo is 26, but he doesn’t know how old I am.  He was thinking I was around his age.  He is wise beyond his years, and im immature for my age…so I guess that does put us on equal ground.  Still a little bump to the ego doesn’t hurt when I put it all into context.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Realities of racism

First of all let me apologize again for my vent/blow up of a couple of days ago.  I probably should have kept that one private.  I try to keep a good attitude most of the time, but sometimes it just boils over.  I’ll have to work on that.  Upon reflection…while my devotional life has been great over here…my praise and worship time has really suffered.  I also don’t have a body of believers to associate with just yet.  Its not an excuse…its just something I have to struggle with.  I miss my kids.  I guess I just have to come to grips with the realities of my decision.  I wanted the best of both worlds with my kids being able to visit…but I guess that isn’t going to happen just yet.  I know im here doing God’s work…im 100% certain I am where im supposed to be.  I was really hurting when one of my friends and readers of this blog wrote to encourage me.  She said..that she was speaking with a missionary friend in Ireland.  This missionary said she felt like she had a target on her back.  That summed up, exactly what im feeling.  I have a target on my back, I feel.  Well I guess I should be encouraged…the enemy doesn’t mess you…if you’re not messing with him.  Perhaps this comes under the category to whom much is given, much is required.  If im given responsibility to be an Ambassador for Christ…I have a responsibility to act appropriately and to defend myself against the attacks.  I guess the other night…I didn’t…I apologize to those of you whom I offended.  It reminds me of the time in 2005 while I was in Saudi Arabia.  I told my then wife…”I think our marriage is under spiritual attack.”  She agreed.  Less than two months later…my marriage for all intents and purposes was over.  In many aspects, I believe I’m back in the Middle East to finish what I started.  I believe my family was supposed to join me…but that’s one of the down sides to a free will…God allows all of our choices..good and bad.  So now im going at it alone. 

It is interesting about the difference in racism over here as compared to the U.S.  In the U.S. the perception of racism seems to be striving to shun/eradicate it, at least in the open.  Here…racism is accepted and no one tries to do anything about it…its just a way of life.  Even the Arabs are racists amongst themselves.  You are divided between Sunni Muslims and Shiite Muslims.  Then you are divided by your countries.  It was fascinating, Khalifa, the founder of the company was telling me the differences between the Egyptians, Jordanians, Palestinians, Emirati’s, Bahraini’s, Qatarians, Saudi’s, and Yemeni’s.  I thought they were all Arabs…but no…they are very distinct how they act, behave and interact with each other.  The differences in race is one reason why I always preface to you whom I interact with, to give you a better picture.  Right or wrong, you are defined by where you come from first and foremost.  Im fortunate, because Americans are quite popular despite the minority factions within Islam that perpetrate violence.  I was speaking with a really interesting man today.  One of the more wealthy Bahraini businessmen on the Island.  He owns a huge construction company, hotels, and country clubs.  He is half Bahraini, and half dutch.  When you look and talk to him, you would swear he was American.  He went to school in Stockton, and Texas  and Missouri.  Essentially he lived in the same neighborhoods that I also lived in.  He was explaining that in Stockton in the late 70’s when he was at school there was lots of crime.  He felt very fearful for his safety.  He never had experienced that while he lived in Bahrain.  Its quite the opposite stereotype of what the U.S. holds. 

His main problem with conducting business is finding laborers.  There is a big push within the Bahraini government to hire Bahraini nationals to work. The problems are…they don’t want to work (most of them) at least for those lower wages.   Instead, companies are forced to hire foreigners (sound familiar?)  So the government is making it increasingly restrictive to hire foreigners and that is grinding the business process to a halt.  I explained to him, that we are having the same problem.  KSDI needs to hire an accountant..yet the accountant they hired cant’ get a proper visa to come over from India.  His response…”We need an accountant too.”  So for business owners it’s a double edge sword.  Most of your labor force because of the world’s economy is very inexpensive (as compared to U.S. standards) but also very hard to secure. 

I am learning to adapt to the cultural differences at work.  For instance, most Indians are very technically adept.  Some of the guys that work for us are brilliant technicians.  Im running into some communication issues.  They rarely will tell you, they don’t understand, or don’t know how to do something.  They will always agree with you.  When you ask them a question, invariable, they will tilt their head back and forth, like a cross between shaking their head no…and nodding yes..  So…I say…I want you to edit this tape as a window dub and burn me a DVD….Do you understand?  They tilt their head…”no problem.”  But do they get it right…sometimes… Its just a challenge culturally I have to overcome.  I always repeat myself anyway…to the point of annoyance…that trait comes in quite handy here…

Monday, November 17, 2008

3 lefts makes somebody's right?...

If this is what it feels like to be right…I want to be wrong….

OK… yesterday was a really bad day. Yet, I still felt compelled to write about it. I apologize if I offended any of you. I try to bottle up the pain and sometimes it spills out. I’ve been told by many…keep a private journal, don’t make everything so public. Well…I’ve always considered myself to be pretty transparent. I think its part of my ministry. But for some…it rubs people the wrong way.

I prayed a lot about this last night and this morning. Im really a bit tormented by my situation. Sometimes, I just get fed up with the perception of life not being fair. I think I attribute that to being human, but that is a cop-out. But I know Christ called us to overcome the world…overcome the flesh, and sometimes, like last night I succumb and just complain. I was listening to a podcast from my home church in Livermore. It was about the parable of the vineyards. Where the workers at the beginning of the day got paid the same amount as the workers at the end of the day. The early workers got upset because they thought they should receive more than the workers that just labored for an hour. Christ told them, we had a deal, I paid you what I said I’d pay you. Why should you be upset with me being generous to the others? That sermon was so appropriate for me the timing was absolutely….God. God didn’t promise me that everything would be fair nor that people should treat me the way I think they should. Everytime I expect life to be fair, I get myself in trouble. This is a perfect example of that. So those of you, that came down on me, thanks… Thanks ever moreso for the prayers and support. A counselor once told me… you can choose to be right…or you can choose to be married. Now that you and your ex-wife are divorced…you can both be right. From first hand experience…it sucks being right…lol….

OK enough of that crap…onto changing the world. I had a great meeting with a guy by the name of Mo Loch. Mo is the young guy who put the awesome party together in Abu Dhabi. (I’ll have the video posted in about a week). Mo, has to be one of the most impressive people I know. He never went to university (he couldn’t afford it, as his parents aren’t wealthy.) yet in 8 years he built an impressive multinational corporation with 60 employees with multiple offices on every continent except Antartica, I think. That’s a continent right? He even has an apartment in the trendy Galleria part of Houston. It’s amazing what Mo has accomplished in such a short period of time…and he’s a dreamer, mover, and a shaker. And get this…he wants to change the world too. So…I meet with Nader, quite by happenstance (God) and Nader and I connect because he wants to change the world…enough so that he is willing to invest the cost of flying me over and infusing the company with enough capital to reinvent itself. And one of the first clients, I meet and work with, Mo, has the same exact vision that Nader and I have. Coincidence? I think not. We all want to break down the misconceptions the west has with the mid-East. The stereotype is the following: Everyone in the West thinks everyone in the east is a terrorist, while the East thinks everyone in the west is an infidel. Guess what…they both think they are right. And what does right get you besides a ticket out of a marriage? It gets you this political crisis, which in a indirect led to our economic crisis. We are right…you guys need democracy and we are right in showing you how to get your democracy and we are right in defending you. We are right in the west…and we’ll go down swinging with our military might to show you so.

Another thing about Mo..we were talking…he is very well connected socially as well…He has lots of friends and knows im not that well connected here yet. So he will introduce me around. He told me…there were a lot of people our age on the island. Our age? He’s equating me with his age…I’ll so take that as a compliment.

Upon further review, being right is overrated.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Warning: More moaning, griping and bellyaching ahead...

Warning:  More moaning, bellyaching and griping ahead…

OK… lets get the Middle East update out of the way so I can really chat about what is on my heart and really tormenting me.  Even though there is such abject poverty and extreme divisions of wealth on this prosperous island…there are absolutely no panhandlers/beggars/homeless people.  Not a one.  No one has their hand out.  Its pretty amazing when you compare that to the west.  I was in small little cafeteria today…which consists of a guy standing behind a burner.  I got an Egg and Cheese sandwich for 0.50 cents.  It was delicious.  As I was leaving a thought had occurred to me.  Im making a modest wage here by U.S. standards…but by the standards of other foreign nationals like the Indians or Sri Lankans, Im making immeasurably more.  Its like Im Warren Buffet or Bill Gates walking around the U.S. by comparison.  Yet with all that comparative difference in wealth, not once have I been approached for a hand out nor once have I felt threatened that I was in danger. 

My thing is Diet Coke…as those of you who know me.  Yet here…they serve Coke Light which isn’t as good…it tastes sweeter than regular diet coke.  But…im adapting.  I gave Priyesh the office boy, about the equivalent of $25 to go buy me a case.  The cokes are about the same price, $4 for a 12 pack.  So when I told him to keep the change…he didn’t understand me.  He doesn’t speak very good English.  He is the lowest paid member of the staff only making $250 per month…yet he’s happy with that.  Its more than what he would make in India by 5 times.  So…when I told him to keep the change, it just didn’t compute.  While it only was $20 on my end…on his end…I was giving him nearly 10% of his monthly salary.  Now…im not saying…oh look at Rick and how wonderful and benevolent he is.  Rather, just how easy it is for wealthy or blessed Americans to be a blessing, just by giving little things away.  I really do have strong aspirations to be ridiculously wealthy.  Nothing brings me greater joy…than by giving it all away and that’s indeed what I would do.  Of course…I have to pay my credit cards off before I really shift into the Mother Theresa mode.  Im still trying to get rid of my Americanism that way. 

OK…those  of you that know me…know that im a fairly decent, nice guy.  Yet, in this whole ugly divorce thing…I’ve been demonized somehow.  I think it’s a fairly common occurrence with most divorces.  I’ve learned to live with it…and let God do my battles.  But when the battle starts to affect my children…or those who I love…it bothers me.  I gave up the fight for my kids to come visit me…as I didn’t want to drag them through an ugly legal battle.  So to keep some semblance of the Beeman influence, my parents, who are great great people by the way.  They love and spoil their grandchildren.  They wanted to spend Christmas with my kids.  So since its my year and I can’t come back just yet…they offered to fly all three children out from Texas to California and then back.  So…just so you don’t think im crazy…here’s a copy and paste of the email that I sent my ex…and her response.  Please let me know if im crazy or overreacting. 

 

11-16-08

After much prayer and speaking with the kids. I have decided not to pursue legal action in order to visit the kids this summer. I certainly hope and pray we can be amicable and reasonable in the future to avoid this sort of conflict. We have to deal with each other for the next 10 years approximately so lets try to keep the acrimony to a minimum.

I will not be able to fly back at Christmas due to my just beginning at this new job. However, my parents would like to spend Christmas with the children since it is my year. I would like them to fly out to California to spend Christmas there and then fly back at the designated times. Would you be willing to drop them off at the airport? If not, i can arrange proper transport. But im sure the kids would rather have you drop them.

I hope all is well with you.

Rick

 

And her response…

 

Yes it is YOUR year, not your parents.  Max talked to you yesterday, tried telling you that they want to visit your parents, here in Texas, for a few days.  Max told you Friday-Monday, and when we asked him if that was really long enough he said he would actually like to stay until Tuesday so we agreed to that.  We DO NOT have to accomodate your parents, but we feel it is important to have them in the kids lives, so do not ever say we are trying to hold you or your parents away from the kids.  So Friday after school until Monday the 21st at 2pm it what Spencer said is ok from him, Max wants Friday until Tuesday and 12pm, and Lindsey would like to visit with them Monday stating at 10am and ending with Spencer at 2pm. Max also says that if this if whined about or if he keeps getting nagged about this like you tend to do then he is going to just take the extra day away and leave with the other two on Monday.  We will not be transporting the kids from our house, but will pick them up as we are supposed to stated in the decree from YOUR residence.  Again, this visit will take place in TEXAS or not at all. 

 

This is not an open offer for your parents to visit on your designated weekends.  It is the holidays and we think it is important to spend it with family so that is why we are agreeing.  We had previously made arrangements for them to visit this weekend with the kids, but that was not accepted, and it is in the decree our weekend.  In the future, if your parents want to visit here in Texas on one of your weekends, it needs to be brought up at least 6 weeks in advance. 

 

So, Friday the 19th after school for Max and Spencer get picked up from our house.  Lindsey gets picked up at our house at 10am Monday the 21st.  We pick up Lindsey and Spencer from your house at 2pm Monday the 21st.  We pick Max up from your house at 12pm Tuesday the 22nd.  This all happens in TEXAS.  

We were already making plans to go away for this week with the kids, so you need to tell Max today if this is ok with you. 

 

OK keep in mind…there are two sides to every story.  Its also not very fair that she can’t tell her side in this forum…but if she wants to move to a foreign country, start a blog, and showcase all of my shortcomings…I won’t get in her way.

Many of you have emailed me praising me for my transparency. I prayed about whether or not I should write about this…and overwhelmingly thought I felt inside was that it was ok for some reason. 

I believe im in the midst of an amazing spiritual battle.  The ways of the enemy are consistent.  If the enemy can’t get you one way…he’ll try another.  I hope its obvious how much I adore my children and how much it hurts being away from them.  The enemy or I should specify devil…and I mean the one with the red horns and pitchfork just to clarify, knows he can get to me by my children.  He is getting to me at times. That’s why when you guys email me…I always say pray for my children.  The enemy comes to lie steal and destroy.   Im sure on the other side of the world…the other family is feeling quite justified with their choices and actions.  But remember…”A man’s ways is right in his own mind…but God weighs the heart.”  I say that when I look in the mirror just to be sure im being honest with myself and not blaming others unnecessarily. 

OK…im done ranting…if any of you are still with me…I’d love to hear your thoughts.  I want to know if im wrong or not. 

I promise to speak more on the Middle East next time…

Saturday, November 15, 2008

1500 channels and nothing to watch...

Its been an interesting weekend.  Im still adjusting to life out here and its weird when i don't have work to distract me.  I think i dread the thought of being alone.  So i try to busy myself with activity.  Im fortunate in the fact that I so love what i do, so work is absolutely fun.  But i know i can't be at the office 24/7.  Its in the down times that i realize that im divorced and alone.  Its interesting...and i feel a little foolish about this.  I purchased something called the Dream box when i got here.  It was a box that let you download all the satellite channels world wide.  Since they sell them in retail outlets, i figured they were legal.  Ummm...i don't think they are anymore...but i already bought it.  What a horrible example of a missionary i am.  But anyway, this box was expensive, i purchased it from the asst. manager in the building so i thought it was legit, especially considering the price.  It was $400 bucks.  But i figured if im moving in, might as well get everything all done at once.  As soon as it was installed, i was absolutely overwhelmed.  I get 1500 channels on like 50 satellite uplinks.  I promptly deleted all the adult channels, a single guy doesn't need 40 adult channels...for that matter anyone doesn't need that.  (I learned my lesson...for those who know me...if not...email me and i'll explain).  So as soon as i scrolled through all the channels (actually one of the main reasons why i got it so i could watch Joel Osteen), it hit me.  I don't watch TV anymore.  Why did i just spend $400 for 1500 channels and i don't watch TV...what was i thinking?   Then i thought...what an American I still am...I want it, i want it, i want it....but do i need it?  Old American habits are hard to break.   Oh well live and learn.  So if any of you want to come over and watch the teletubbies in Portugese...im your man.  


I bring this up, because you would think with all my isolation...i would lose myself in the vast land of TV.  But no, i've busy non-stop really and i've loved it.  This weekend was the first real challenge where i didn't have much to do, and i was a little intimidated to be alone.  But...it was a good weekend.  Im getting more and more comfortable in my own skin and comfortable being alone.  I do believe that prayer is the key.  I know that many of you are praying for me...because i've seen it in your many many emails.  I actually felt the prayers this weekend.  Prayers work.  I think i bring up my divorce so much because its heavily on my mind again because of the previous time i was in Saudi Arabia.  Then...i was very lonely...absolutely miserable because i missed my family sooooooo much.  Then my marriage ended.  Now, i've come back to the land where i was so miserable and i have completely different attitude and outlook.  Im not miserable...im thriving and its weird.  The only explanation is that im walking according to God's plan and he's blessing me for it.  Last time, when i found the emails and realized my marriage was in serious jeopardy, the wave of depression and panic was absolutely intense and devastating.  It was like someone had covered me with 50 wet wool blankets making it virtually impossible to move.  I remember one time specifically feeling these emotional blankets on me.  Then all of a sudden for no reason at all...the weight was lifted temporarily...a reprieve like i could breathe again.  I could sense God's presence in that moment and i knew someone somewhere in the world was praying for me.  I talked to a few people a day or two later and i asked...where you praying for me between 12:45-1:15 your time two days ago? Indeed they were.  That has happened to me multiple times.  So if you feel led to pray for someone don't discount it.  It works.  I could tell this weekend...many of you were praying for me.  It is very appreciated.  


I went to the mall on Friday (which is our Saturday on the weekend thing).  I just enjoyed watching everyone.  The Saudi's descend upon Bahrain en masse on the weekend. They come to drink, eat pork, watch movies, and hang out at the mall.  There really is nothing socially for the Saudi's to do in Saudi Arabia.  They like to drive around (Cruise) go to the mall and walk around, and spend time with family. That's it...that's all there is to do.   They can't interact with girls...can't even speak to them.  If you speak to a woman that isn't your wife, you could get arrested in Saudi.  Women can't drive, no movies, no blockbuster, no churches other than Islamic churches, no alcohol and for me at least worst of all...no pork!!!  You never realize how much you miss a ham sandwich until you can't get one.  Its interesting because guys don't talk to the girls, they don't really know how to interact with them when given the opportunity. That's why arranged marriages are so vital here.  And if arranged marriages are bad? Consider the U.S. where divorce is 1 in 2 (present company included) or in the U.K where the number is around 2 out of 3 marriages end in divorce.  Compare that with India where with arranged marriages the divorce rate is 10%.  OK...back to the guy/girl thing.  In the restaurants in Saudi Arabia, its divided into two sections...single males and families.  There is never any mixing.  Thus in Bahrain you see the effects of that culture.  The men and boys walk around in packs of 3-6 while the girls do the same.  They just don't interact.  Oh...i forgot..if a guy is interested in a girl.  He'll wad up a piece of paper or a business card and throw it at the girl hoping to not be noticed (ive seen this happen)  Then if the girl is interested she'll call him on her cell phone.  The Mutawa...(religious police with the long Osama bin laden type of beards) patrol the areas to make sure that the laws of Islam are followed.  If your abaya (black robe) is too short, they'll whack you on the ankles with a stick.  Or if you are a man and not in prayer during the call to prayer...they'll whack you then too.  The Mutawa are trying to maintain their grip of control on Saudi..but its a losing battle.  The traditionalists want it to return to the 7th century when the Prophet Muhammad roamed the earth.  But with the advent of cell phones, (cameras are illegal too in Saudi) internet and Satellite TV.  The west/rest of the world is slowly influencing the younger generations much to chagrin of the older more conservative generations.  That's why some of the hardliners hate the west so much.  They think we are ruining their culture.  in actually the young people are gravitating towards that lifestyle.  Rather than confront the young people its easy just to blame the west.  Isn't it interesting that people that aren't honest with themselves often try to blame others for their shortcomings.  


Well Bahrain is completely different than Saudi.  There are no Mutawa, and you can be free to worship, drink a beer, go to a club, or watch a movie  Still some of the Saudi don't really know what to do here...other than cruise and walk in a pack in the mall.  That's what they know and what they are comfortable with.  .  Many people are amazed when i tell them, that Bahrain is very similar to the U.S. in many respects as is Dubai.  I feel just as safe and comfortable here as i do at home.  At no point since i've been here, have i felt threatened.  I did feel threatened in Saudi a little a few years back but not here.


Another interesting think about the Arabs here is the way they wear their gutras (headpieces).  Each arab wears it a little different.  It seems like thumbprints or snowflakes, each gutra is a little different.  ITs like having different hair styles.  They use it to be distinct from each other.  Its subtle but still distinctive.  It's late (11:15 pm) i think ill head to bed early...no tv again...i thank God for your prayers...


Rick

Friday, November 14, 2008

Omar and the Romanian

OK...i stayed up way too late after the night with the filipina girls and the diet cokes.  I was a little restless...so i called my beautiful romanian friend.  OK...everyone likes my transparency or so they email...here's some more blatant honesty.  Im over here all alone, yet im having a blast most of the time...still after living with someone for 15 years and then sleeping alone, well its is a little hard to get used to.  Especially when that other person is now sleeping with someone else...but i digress.  So i've got realize the vulnerability of my situation.  The romanian has made it abundantly clear that she is only interested in friendship (here words tell me one thing but her eyes and body tell me another, so im not sure what to believe.)  Is a missionary even supposed to talk like this?  Am i even a missionary? i guess with the Romanian i have a choice...i can say yes and agree to stay as a friend or no...cut my friendship off entirely.  Its really a lose lose situation since i dont have many friends on the island yet.  Its a little like that movie legends of the fall...where the three brothers, all fell for the same girl...of course they are going to fall for her...she's the only girl for 300 miles.  The same goes for me.  She's young beautiful intelligent, used to be a personal trainer...hello of course im going to fall for her eventually...i have to so guard my heart...yet i don't want to guard my heart anymore, it sucks already.  Im so ready to have a relationship and have that emotional intimacy again.  i really miss that.  i think the most beautiful moment in a relationship is when you can have an entire conversation with your spouse without having to use any words.  i guess  i just have to do that whole delayed gratification thing.  I know God has a plan, i just have to be patient enough to wait for it.  Paul was a single missionary...but for some reason...that's not  a real big comfort to me right now.  I guess i just have to be patient.  i do have tentative dates set up with a beautiful Russian girl and a beautiful dutch girl for next week.  So who am i to complain.  But after years of being married...i can honestly say...dating sucks.  im tired of window shopping and am finally ready to make a purchase.  So if you are married hug your spouse and don't be so concerned about being right.  


I wanted to get up early to go to church, they do some churches on Friday since it is the weekend.  But...i stayed up soooo late writing in this blog, and being on facebook, i decided to go the Sunday church instead.  I actually haven't been to a service as of yet.  I just found out where the Christian churches were.  Now i have to go check them out to make sure i can get fed.  Never underestimate the value of surrounding yourself with like Christian believers.  Its so important as iron sharpens iron.  The negative can also be true.  My friend Wayne has a saying, "Show me who your friends are...I'll show you what your destiny is."  That has rung true so often in life.  I have talked to many many many divorced men and women.  If there is a common thread (especially in the areas of infidelity) there usually always is a "bad influence friend" that acts as an enabler.  Misery loves company and the friend usually tries to drag the other down to feel better about their own actions.  So married couples...be extremely vigilant on who you allow into your lives in social settings...Its so important.  Water always seeks its own level and usually with weaker friends...we usually come down to their moral standard rather than raising them up.  Its weird failure is the best teacher.  So its counter intuitive (i love that word) for a divorced man to be giving advice on how to make a marriage work.  But i've learned more what makes a successful marriage work in the year of my failed marriage than some couples learn in a lifetime.  That is why im a little anxious to put my new found revelations to work.  Rather than just being alone all the time.


I met with Omar today at his house.  Omar is the youngest of the Shaheen children, a very bright and articulate guy.  He was the previous GM at KSDI before he went into Banking.  Omar is a brilliant salesman.  If he can continue to make the connections and open the door for us...there could easily be a very lucrative partnership down the road.  Its a little strange being in the family business that way.  Khalifa, the father, made me feel great the other day.  He said...i consider you like my son...you are part of the family.  That really made me feel great.  Especially being half way across the world...where communication with my own children is strained...its nice to have someone care about you that much.  But that said...its a family business...and while they made it clear im a member of their family, i have to remember that im not blood, more like step brother or something.  Omar and i are on the absolute same page in terms of the potential growth of the company.  His wife just had a baby.  She flew to England so the child could be born with a British Citizenship and a passport.  That was incredibly forward thinking on their part.  Being from the West certainly has its privileges. Im rambling, so i should pull this to a close.  Talk to you tomorrow.


Rick