Rick Beeman

  The more and more time that passes the more I am accepting of my reality that this is my new normal. Does that mean I’m happy about it?  Heck No!  But with acceptance that I cannot change my reality comes peace.  Perhaps I’m over the grieving phase of my loss moving directly into the acceptance phase.  The five stages of grief if I need to remind you (I had to remind myself): The five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I went through the first four kicking and screaming.  Now I’m rounding into acceptance and I was tested on it today.  I had a great week.  Even a fabulous week.  Did I win the lottery, reconcile? Or get a promotion?  No, what made it a fabulous week was simply my attitude.  Something that was entirely in my control.  Event wise it was a fairly non-chalant week.  I did have my daughters to look forward to this weekend so that always helps.  But the weekend did not quite go a...

  I feel as if I am in a spiritual and psychological battle with an In his prime Mike Tyson. I’m trying to withstand the heavy blows. This morning I woke up with such a heaviness that was pretty inexplicable.  I make a habit of the first thing that comes out of my mouth (outloud) after the alarm bell rings is “This is the day the Lord has made.  I will rejoice and be glad in it.”  Its a good way to start out the day.  Since I’m alone most of the time I just talk out loud to God like someone you are having a conversation with.  It’s not awkward when you are by yourself.  I’m also quite honest with Him.  Like God I don’t like this…or God I’m lonely…or God I need hope.  I also throw in a lot of praise and thanksgiving in order to balance it out.  Sometimes God answers in pretty cool ways, often times he does not.  That’s the time where there is one set of footprints in the sand. iykyk This morning on my commute into work I just felt th...