Rick Beeman

  It dawned on me earlier today.  I’ve been married for more than half of my life.  Now this might not seem like a great accomplishment for those of you that are over 50 and have had one marriage to your name (which is the way God designed it to be…but I digress).  I have two 15 year marriages and I just turned 57.  So more than half my life was spent with the responsibility of being a husband/father.  One of the ways I’ve tried to live my life was putting other people’s needs ahead of my own for most of the time.  That’s been the ideal anyway.  So when you’re in a God centered marriage, God comes first, wife second, children 3rd, occupation 4th, then the rest you can fill in according to your convictions.  So more than half my life I’ve tried to put my wife’s/family needs ahead of my own.  So much so in fact that I didn’t have a life/identity outside of being a family man.  That is taking it’s toll on my identity now that I’m separ...

  I had a really nice weekend.  Having my girls is a mixed blessing.  It makes me so less lonely being with them.  But it’s also bittersweet as it reminds me what it was like when I was with them full time and I obviously miss that. I took so many things for granted in the past thinking Love lasts forever.    Why can’t I just be happy and count my blessings for the present instead of longing for yesterday.  I’m sure I will get there eventually but this is a process.  My wife was kind enough to let me have the dog until Tuesday.  Usually I go through a mild depression when I drop the girls off.  But having the dog here is soothing.  It helps the come down seem less drastic.   I was also greatly encouraged by church today.  It seemed as if the preacher Bryan Lorritts from the Summit had been following me around the past six months and wrote a specific sermon exactly for my present situation.  The title of the messa...