Reluctant Acceptance
It’s another good day. This is starting to be the trend. Again, nothing out of the ordinary happened to me today. But nothing bad happened today either. I think it is just a matter of me accepting my reality of being alone. I can’t do anything in my power to change anything at the moment. The only thing I can control is how I respond to it. At first the grief, despair and solitude were quite overwhelming. Those emotions are still there but I’m responding differently. I believe it has largely to do with my faith. I’m just trusting God through all of this. I know it sounds cliche but I can’t look at 8 months from now and wonder what is going to happen. I can only look at tomorrow. I have no idea what the future will hold. I continue to pray but God doesn’t always answer my prayers in the manner in which I ask. It’s either Yes, No, or not yet. It’s the “not yet” that is the hard part....