Missionary Dating

Missionary Dating (kind of like dead man walking, Right?)

I have asked myself...am I a missionary here?  I mean my idea of missionaries are people preaching in huts in Africa.  Previously being a missionary, i have worked with some amazing people that do not know how they are survive from month to month...but God always provided for them.  I guess I can't classify myself as a missionary in that respect since I am making a comfortable living, live in a nice place (see pics below) and my primary job is not preaching.  So if i offend anyone with stating my calling, i apologize.  What I do know...is that I am called to be here in this foreign country, God is blessing me tremendously, and i am trying to help spread his Gospel through my lifestyle and words.  Christ commanded us to go out and preach the gospel to all the world.  That is the great commission.  I think we are called to be missionaries, no matter where we might live.  Im blessed because of my previous "official" missionary journeys, beginning in Taiwan, paved the way for me to go to Saudi Arabia..which paved the way for this tremendous opportunity here in Bahrain.  That said, I was bemoaning the fact of my loneliness to God just two days ago.  I know if Im called, he's going to provide the strength and support system to not only survive but to thrive.  After the race coverage yesterday I went to my new apartment.  Im pretty spoiled.  Its a beautiful place with a spare furnished bedroom.  Its absolutely gorgeous and very comfortable.  With that in mind, I want to invite any of you that might want to experience The Middle East along with me, you are more than welcome to be my honored guests at anytime.  There is a direct flight from Houston/SF/LA to Dubai...and then its only a short hop over to Bahrain.  I think the price runs around $1500 for a round trip ticket on Emirates Air.  So please i would love for you to be my guest sometime.  Just email me and we can chat about it.  

OK, after I settled into my apartment, I talked to this girl, who just so happens to live about 1/8 of a mile away from me.  She's a 26 year old, beautiful, Romanian Flight attendant for Gulf Air.  We connected so we met for appetizers at Trader Vic's at the Ritz Carlton then went to a club.  Are you kidding me???  Im a 40 year old divorced guy, in a foreign country with Muslims mostly wearing abayas and I happen upon this beauty who is incredibly smart, engaging, and wants to be an actress.  If any of you ever needed proof that there is a God...forget the Red Sea...here's your proof right here.  And just in case you are wondering...and i know some of you are...i did not kiss her goodnight.  She's going to introduce me to some of her friends...so I can start having some more friends on the island.  So that should help alleviate the loneliness.  You see God indeed cares about this little things.  So is it ok for a missionary to date?  As long as i'm careful, i think it is.  

I know I bemoan the fact of my divorce.  But to many of you that emailed me, you say I (or rather the Holy Spirit through me) speaks to you.  So Im going to continue...but I refuse to be bitter.  Talking about my divorce and my present situation is important.  Because my past defines me and it has a chance to define my future if I don't handle it in a positive manner. One of my dear Bible study friends Mark (who also went through a bitter ugly divorce five years ago and still has some of the scars) told me, i thought my divorce was pretty bad.  But after hearing your stories I feel better about myself.  That's why I think as Christians its ok to share our pain with one another to reach out so we don't feel that we are all alone.  We all have the same pain, fears, and frustrations.  And no matter what circumstance, I or anoyone else might be going through...someone always has it worse.  That helps you put life in contexts and make it through the day.  Thank God for instance my children are healthy and seemingly thriving.  My ex is a good and responsible mother in certain aspects and that is very good for them.  There...i counted my blessings.   OK...with that said...let me forewarn you that Im going to gripe and complain for just a bit so leave now or skip to the next paragraph if you don't want this negativity in your life.  I often ask many of you to pray for my kids, let me explain to you why your prayers are so coveted and needed.  Im in a battle with my ex-wife to have my children come visit me.  At first they were very enthusiastic (at least my boys were...i haven't seen my daughter since July), but somehow they don't want to come now...I'll let you read between the lines as to why.  Im trying to nicely negotiate visitation with my ex...but she refuses saying its the kids choice (though heavily influenced) and she doesn't want to get involved.  Even though I pleaded, I got an email from her yesterday refusing to negotiate or compromise, thus Im going to have to go back to court to protect my rights as a father for them to visit me out here.  At the end of the caustic email my ex-wife wrote this  (Im copying and pasting):  (And by the way--if the kids are so afraid of Sean, then why did Spencer invite HIM to the "Dad and donuts" function at his school this morning?  They both looked pretty happy headed out the door!)

 I can think of no other reason why she wrote this than to hurt me.  This is just a slight indication of what the last three years have been like for me as my relationship with children has become increasingly strained.  I know the axiom that "hurting people hurt people," so I have to take this in context.  But still, sometimes those jabs are a tough blow.  Fortunately, God's grace has made me slightly immune and somewhat callous to such emotional stings.  I've become used to them.    Still there is residual effects that will ultimately harm the children long-term and that is what Im most concerned about. (im not sharing all the details because I don't think that is entirely edifying and is somewhat salacious, but you'll have to trust me).   All i want for my fractured family now is peace and harmony.  Unfortunately, I haven't been able to get that, and that is where your prayers are most needed.  Im sure Im speaking to a lot of divorced people right now...because the names might have changed but the stories are the same.  It says in  Proverbs 21:2-3 (New International Version) 2 All a man's ways seem right to him, but the LORD weighs the heart.

So for divorced people...or really anyone in conflict, its sometimes absolutely pointless to argue with someone so convinced and set in their ways.  But as you can see, for the sake of my children, I sometimes feel like i have to keep fighting.  Yet each time I do...i usually wind up with the same exact result.  The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.  So what do I do? Just give up on my relationship with the kids and stop trying?  Its a tough dilemma.  I just have to trust God that he has a "perfect" plan mapped out.  i have to learn to be patient and wait on God.  Waiting sucks.  But in the meantime, I have a great job.  im writing to you again from the Media Center at the race track waiting for the main race to start.  Later tonight, I see the beautiful Romanian girl for coffee.  Things could be a lot worse...Who am i to complain? 

rick