In Perspective

I was feeling sorry a little for myself last night and that doesn’t happen very often.  You see I had been communicating with this beautiful girl from the Czech Republic who is currently living in North Carolina.  We were chatting often and I was falling for her.  I know I know…if you read this blog you’ll soon find out I fall for lots of girls.  I think it’s a product of my divorce.  I have such a longing for a companion again, when I see someone that might fit, I have a tendency to get too excited and move way too fast.  I think it has something to with the ridiculously high standards that I have in girls.  I’m only attracted to extremely beautiful girls, and for me to stay attracted they have to be extremely intelligent  and have a passion for God.  So those types of girls aren’t easy to find.  Thus when I find one, I tend to overdo it because of the sheer excitement of the possibilities.  So there I was falling for this Czech Girl and she kind of broke off the whole “I just want to be friends thing” because she admitted she wasn’t that attracted to me.  That’s what I get for dating semi-super models, I guess.  So I was down and depressed.  Im sick of being alone.  I want to find the “one”  Im ready for a serious relationship I think.  So there I was feeling sorry for myself this morning when I got a facebook message from Amy Bancroft’s account.  Amy was a dear friend that I went to college with.  The IM said…Hi rick this is Michael, Amy’s husband.  I wanted to let you know that Amy is dying, she only has 24 hours to live.  Wow…was that sobering.  Here I was feeling sorry for myself and this life and death situation to someone I know was really happening.  I didn’t know what to say, other than Im sorry, and my prayers are with you, which they were…I don’t offer that as insincere support.  This really helped me put my own crap into perspective.  I don’t have problems compared to Michael.  How dare I complain and feel sorry for myself.  So we did indeed pray for her.  We split up our church today, since our facility wasn’t available.  I had a couple people over from the church and we watched a Joel Osteen video and prayed for Amy.  I got back on the internet and facebook and saw Amy’s icon again.  I asked Michael for an update and he informed me that Amy had passed at 1:20 that morning.  My heart just sunk.  I’ve only chatted with Amy 10 times or so since college, but they were all meaningful.  A friend that you make like Amy in college is one you consider that you have for a lifetime.  Michael was trying to be strong, and he even admitted to me that he was doing all right because his beloved wife didn’t have to suffer anymore.  That’s the crazy thing about the peace that passes all understanding.  It doesn’t make sense that it works…it just does.  So Ive tried to stay in a state of prayer for Michael and Amy’s family all day.  It just really sucks that this happened.  It helps me realize how blessed and fortunate I am.  Yes I may have a fractured relationship with my children, but at least they are healthy and I will see them again.  Its sad that X is turning them against me (she denies this) but I know someday they’ll figure out the truth.  There are a lot of unfair things that happen in this life.  God gives us the strength to endure the tough stuff when we seek them.  So if you think about today, please shout out a quick prayer for support and encouragement to the Schoolfield/Bancroft family.  Im glad you’re suffering is finally over Amy.  Save a spot for me up in heaven.