As anticipated...a Better Day.

 I figured today would be better and it certainly was. I just need to anticipate the horrible days and incorporate them into my routine as part of the recovery process.  I’m thankful that these horrible days are becoming fewer and far between.  I’m grateful to be making significant psychological progress.  6 months ago it was 6 and ½ horrible days and a ½ decent day.  Then it switched to 5 horrible days and 2 decent ones.  The closer I got to chasing God the more the horrible days inverted with the good days.  I’m thankful that I’m up to 5 good days to every 2 bad days now.  I aim to keep the streak headed in the right direction.  The positive part for me is that the good days are NOT dictated by circumstance.  Thus they are more achievable with consistency.  The thing I’m doing is “Seeking God with all my heart, soul and mind” on a continuous basis.   All these things are slowly being added unto me.  

Today was a very good day despite the fact that I did not see or communicate with my kids.  I’ve always made it a habit to surround myself with strong people.  Iron sharpens Iron.  Another adage is “Show me who your friends are, and I’ll show you what your destiny is.  Now that I have a whole lot more free time on my hands I’m trying to surround myself with strong Christian men in my life.  That was not much of a priority while I was living under the same roof as my family. Maybe it should have been.  I reasoned that friendships take time, energy and effort.  I would much rather place that effort into my wife and kids.  I thought prioritizing family was a noble choice but in retrospect it might have put too much undue pressure on my wife.  So I’m doing all the things I should have done then…now.  I’m starting to see the benefits of it.  A friend invited me to a Men’s group that meets on Tuesday evenings.  I used to be part of two  Bible Study/fellowship groups that met in the early mornings.  Since I started working at the school and arrive at 6:30a, I just couldn’t attend any longer.  I missed the strength of meeting with those men.  I think this new group is going to work out time wise as well.  I need as many strong, positive and Godly influences in my life as possible.  I’m thankful that I was invited to join these men.  It seems that we were all a bunch of broken men holding on for the promises of God for restoration.  I felt right at home.  

I’m so excited about the Christmas Break coming up.  I get to see my girls for about half and I am stoked about it.  There are a lot of positive things happening right now.  God is faithful.  I need to remember that even in the quiet despair of the horrible days which are bound to happen.  Emotionally and psychologically I feel as if I’ve been involved in a head on collision going 70 mph.  Thank God I was wearing a seatbelt (my faith).  But these injuries I have sustained are going to take months of healing with plenty of rehab. I need to stay in that mindset and not go looking for short cuts or quick fixes.    I’m grateful that I have a great spiritual insurance plan.  Today was a good day but as I recount it through this blog I’m being convinced in real time that it was a good day with a great finish.