What a great great great day I had. Why was it great? Im not really sure. Nothing very consequential happened. Its just that I feel like God’s hand is on my every move. I know there are tons of people out there praying for me. That is such a great feeling. I feel like Im on the spiritual war front lines. So you might have noticed that I was really down. But then, the clouds parted and the oppression lifted, really for no reason at all. Im so full of hope and joy right now. I told Jennifer this earlier, but I’ve never been so sure that she’s the girl for me then at this precise moment. A lot of people don’t understand this. Everyone says take it slow. Well…I did take it slow the first time around in marriage, a three-year courtship and engagement, and look how that turned out. So taking it slow isn’t always the way. I just have to look at all my Indian friends. I love Indians, but I just hate their food. Its sooooo spicy. I believe that Indians are my favorite culture of people. They are so smart, work so hard, are genuine, and kind. Really fantastic. Its like a world full of Apu’s out here. In Bahrain Indian’s comprise of 50% of the population. And Californian’s are worried about Mexicans…pffffttt. The joke is if all the Indians would leave Bahrain, this island would cease to exist. OK…back to the Indian dating thing. Saji, our editor just went back to get engaged last month. Did he know who he was getting engaged to? No. What usually happens is the parents pick our 4-5 potential brides. Then the groom interviews them, and picks one. I think they then get married fairly quickly after that, like a 1-2 week engagement. Wait..isn’t that just like a reality game show? So Indians don’t go through a long courtship, engagement phase. But they go into it with the right mindset. Marriage is for life…we have to figure out how to make this work. So it’s a little like an arranged marriage, with a couple of options. So is the Western/American model better? Is more freedom to choose the best way? I checked the stats online and got this from divorcerate.org
--Divorce rates
US - 50%
India - 1.1%
So 11 marriages out of 1000 end in divorce in India. That is just incredible. The U.S. doesn’t have the highest divorce rate in the world. That honor belongs to Sweden at 54.9%. So is having more freedom to choose and court your mate better? Just look at the stats. What is even scarier, is the divorce rate in the U.S. for second, third and fourth marriages. Second is 75%, Third is 86%, Fourth is 94%, Im not sure if they keep stats for fifth marriages, Someone call Elizabeth Taylor and ask her. So those number are daunting. Am I scared to get married again and brave these statistics, not really. Before Jenni, I would say sure. But now…the answer is Heck no. We both feel that this coming marriage is an arranged marriage, only its being arrange by God. We both feel very strongly about that. The circumstances that led to us coming together seem totally orchestrated. God has been absolutely directing my steps and talking to me constantly for the last four years. That is why I can say with absolute certainty that she’s the one. I told you how emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically we are perfect matched for each other. But here’s the part were God goes the extra mile. She’s 29, and she’s been playing soccer since she was seven. So she has one of those soccer playing bodies. If you watched any of the U.S. Women’s soccer team…you should know that girl soccer players are pretty hot…and Jennifer…well she’s smoking. The important thing is that she has an absolute and unabated heart for God. The whole body and beauty thing is God showing off for the world how good he can be. Well…show off all you want God, I’ll let them know. Only 14 more days til she comes out. Can you tell…Im a little bit excited.
11 comments:
Thanks Ricky Rick.
Now i have to work out extra hard or i'm in trouble. 2 weeks to a better body. I'll publish the book later. ;) No pressure.
Signed,
Your Beloved
Divorce in India is extremely low compared to the United States. In America around half of marriages end in divorce, but in India it is a mere one per cent. It is so low that many have the idea that it is illegal. This is not the case but there are many reasons that could contribute to these contrasting figures. One important factor could be that divorce is not deemed as socially acceptable in India. It is considered a blemish on your character, meaning it is something a lot of people won't even contemplate no matter what situation they find themselves in. Some would suggest that family values are more important to Indians than Americans. People tend to live in larger family units, and when you marry someone you are in many respects marrying the whole family. It therefore has more of an impact on the wider family if people get divorced which means they tend to feel more shame. To get more details about this you can visit the link Do It Yourself Divorce.
I actually spoke with an Indian coworker today about Divorce and he echoed what you are saying here Jonathan. Women especially are looked at as "damaged goods" if they are divorced. Men are as well, but not as much. Hmmm, double standards for men and women? What a shocker.
I must admit, that while statistics do not lie, they are only reporting the facts and give little indication to informtion such as what is confounded by variables such culture, common practice, and so on.
Unfortuntately here in the United States, couples will enter a relationship with the belief: "I can always get divorced if this doesnt work out..." ultimately condemning the marriage before it even begins.
I think the better (best) attitude to have in approaching marriage is: "We will make this work no matter the trails"
After all, don't the vows read in them somewhere FOR BETTER OR WORSE TILL DEATH????
India values Relations. Couples have faith and keep flexibility by accepting good and bad points in their partners, as no one is perfect. If you see the love marriage in India, they are very successful too and increasing, as parents are accepting love marriages. Trust, Faith and ability to forgive are very important factors in a relation other than Love alone. When you see your parent's 25th or 50th wedding anniversary, you get inspired and dream the same. This makes Indian Marriages so successful. Best thing in India is its culture and emotions. INDIA ROCKS!
Swapnil is right. If you are surrounded by models of long-term marriage, then you are more likely to follow that yourself. Also don't underestimate the issue of economics. A no-income mum with 6 kids can't really countenance divorce no matter the situation.
India is having low divorce rate because they have commitment in the relationship. About social disrespect for divorces, it is not the real issue because things have changed a lot because of education. Indians believe in finding happiness with one person and make things better for them. And also after kids they believe that from then it's about the kids, not about them anymore
Hmmmm...marriage arranged by God. Well good luck with that, hope it's going well.
The Western approach to marriage is "Love first, then marriage", while I was told when I spent time in India that their approach used to be (I don't know how much it has changed since I spent time there; in the 80s) "Marriage, then learn to love your spouse." It does show a different approach that may work longer.
A no-income mum with 6 kids can't really countenance divorce no matter the situation...
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