Another really nice day. Things are progressing smoothly at work. I have a pretty efficient plan in place. So we are moving along at a good pace. We are about to get really busy as April is a big month for weddings plus all the other productions that we have to do. So it’s a little bit like the calm before the storm. I want the storm to happen and I want to rage, but keeping our work under control at all times. I just recently bought another edition of The Fire of Delayed Answers by Bob Sorge. Now of all the Christian books I’ve ever read (ive read a lot) the one that blessed me the most was this one. What’s funny about that declarative statement is that I’ve never ever finished the book. The story goes back two years ago, when I was reading it and God was totally revealing himself to me through it. Basically, God sometimes delays the answer so that we will seek after him and be able to hear his voice. So I prayed for the reconciliation of my marriage for three years. It didn’t happen…and God was revealing to me the reason why was so that I could more clearly hear his voice and deepen my walk with him. So Im sitting in Jack in the Box eating my breakfast sandwich two years ago thanking God so much that He is speaking clearly to me…totally loving my relationship with Him…when a black lady and her two kids sit in the booth next to me. She asks me what Im reading. Immediately the voice inside my head goes off (God) give her the book. So I start arguing with that voice…”No…Im learning to hear God’s voice…Im not finished with it yet.” So I explain to her its about listening to God’s voice. So here’s how the three way conversation went. “Oh really…I need something like that….Give her the book…No, Im not done with it yet…Where would I go about buying that book…Give her the book…No…Well its not available in a bookstore you have to buy it online….Give her the book…No…maybe when im done reading it, I’ll send it to her if I get her address….Oh, where online would I find it? ….Give her the book….Maybe Amazon.com….(she starts writing down the name of the book)….Good, well I don’t have computer access but when I do in about two weeks, Im going to be sure to order that right away because…Ah…here’s the book. So I gave her the book and you would have thought I was giving her a thousand dollars. She was so appreciative saying things like you don’t know what this means to me… yadda yadda yadda…I was mad. I didn’t want to give her book but I knew I was supposed to. Yet less than 12 hours later in Wed. night church the message from Marcos Witt was listening to the voice of God and giving stuff away…three days later Joel preached from the pulpit to be a blessing to others by giving small things away. It was absolute confirmation that I did the right thing. I was hearing God’s voice correctly. So it took me about a year to finally getting around to ordering another copy of The Fire of Delayed Answers. I start reading it again and again God was blessing me through this book. I got to about halfway through, right at the same place I had previously read to…and I’m on a flight back to CA. (for a year I flew from TX to CA every other weekend for my visitation. But that’s another blog.) so I sat next to another black lady. And she asks me what I was reading. This conversation/argument with God lasted half the time. So after a minute or two…I gave her the book. Turns out she was a pastor’s wife. So it took me about another year. This book is hard to find, you have to special order it. I finally get the book. I had my parents bring it out, because I can’t ship it directly here. I made it through the first two chapters again. I just barely started it. God is totally blessing me through it again. I decide to eat at Appleby’s take a long lunch and really get into reading it and learn God more. As soon as I sit down, the Filipino waiter asks me what Im reading. I explain it to him. He says…”Why do bad things happen to good people?” I sigh…and say…here take the book. He didn’t know how to respond…but I think I planted a seed…we spoke briefly about his life. He said…the thing that’s missing in his life is faith…he’s sure of that. So I took his number down, and gave it to Beni, our accountant who happens to be a Filipino pastor. I told him she would be calling him to invite him to her church. So she did call him and he was quite surprised to learn I was the GM at the company. He kept remarking how simple I was. I took that as a compliment. I tend to not have any “airs” about who I am. So I think he is going to try out her church. If nothing else…a seed was planted. So next time I order that book, Im thinking Im going to buy three copies and read it as fast as I possibly can.
I had invited some members of my acting class to my positive living group tonight. We are growing. We had about 11 people there tonight. I told my testimony/story. I went over everything, even my past addiction/sin. Im pretty transparent about everything in my life…even the ugly crappy stuff. Its my testimony. I think it really spoke to them. None of these people, I don’t think..other than the regulars, Guy, Bene, and Reji, were Christians. This is exactly who I feel called to speak to. So I tried not use a lot of religiosity and just be real…like I always am. It sure opened up a lot of interesting conversation with no judgment or fear of reprisals of judgment. We stayed and talked for an hour afterwards, ate pizza, my dear friend (who prefers to be nameless) brought these wonderful Indian rice cakes. She also told me that she can’t sleep at night until she reads this blog…so that made me feel kind of good. Overall it was a great night. Its not my job to convert these people. Its my job to seek God…and make myself available and transparent to everyone I come across. However God chooses to use me…I’ll be used. We all had a great night and it will be interesting to see how many come back the next week. Lakewood Church just sent me a third package full of materials. They are really supporting me in this endeavor. Im very very blessed. I miss my kids…please continue to pray for the restoration of my relationship with them.
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